She Wants Him To Watch Her Get ****ed By Two Guys

"Not only do you have to be careful who you choose to do the advanced stuff on, you also have to be man enough to handle what happens when you release a woman's sexual potential."

There's some serious truth to those words, David. "Be careful what you wish for" would be similar.

In my teens, I enjoyed what I've come to call my "summer of love". A friend of mine and I spent an idle afternoon in a small town to meet a couple girls we'd been chatting with online off and on… I'll call them "C" and "V". I ended up having them both attracted to me and soon thereafter "V" was my girlfriend, with "C" loudly expressing regrets at "not getting to try me out first".

"V" and I were both young, but I had a fair bit more experience than her at that point. We talked about it, and logically arrived at the conclusion that we should remain a unit, but with freedom to explore other people sexually, ie: an open relationship. As infatuated as we were (and horny, being teenagers!) it was the only thing that made sense.

What happened thereafter can only be described as "opening the flood gates to the complete and unrestrained libidos of two sex-crazed teen sluts". We went slightly insane, I think. I methodically tapped every single one of her girlfriends, while she explored possibilities that were inconvenient to her before (guys she was interested in fun with but didn't want a relationship or a bunch of awkward attachment issues).

Sounds like fun, right? I won't lie. It was… but it was very self-oriented. Both of us went out to do others purely for our own ego stroking. This came back to haunt us later, when we started talking about threeways.

Our first threesome was with "C", and it was glorious (albiet harder work than I anticipated… keeping one demanding, horny little nympho happy is hard enough work, now suddenly I had two!), another later with another friend of hers we'll call "R". In the afterglow of "R" we were all talking and eating pizza, when it came up that her brother was really interested in "V", and suggested that it was only fair I return the threeway favour.

Noone can really say how they're going to react the first time they see the woman they love getting fucked right in front of them. It's like being shot at, or suddenly being on the receiving end of a sucker punch: despite whatever bravado-laden reaction you THINK you'll have or amount of mental preparation you make, until you're in the moment actually experiencing it you simply have no idea.

Turns out, I reacted badly.

It'd be hard to categorize exactly how many emotions went through my head in those short minutes, but they ran the gamut from murderous rage to deep depression and all points in between, and I was ill prepared to process them let alone understand or compensate for them. I at least had enough presence of mind to leave before I did any damage to anyone in my volatile state.

The relationship went on, but it was never quite the same. "V" was clearly shaken at my reaction and couldn't understand why it would be anything at all like that considering I'd just banged my way through her entire social circle. She always told me who it was she'd been with (devoid of details) so I wasn't able to say I wasn't aware of what she was up to. Besides, didn't I know that she did those threesome with "C" and "R" to make me happy? Didn't I love her?

I couldn't even explain WHAT happened to me, let alone why. We decided to 'close' the relationship but it didn't last but a few months more before we went our separate ways.

It took me a while, but I was eventually able to untangle the mess and make some sense of it all. Ultimately I realized that I interpreted it as an attack against me because I was only thinking about my own ego gratification at the time. In my mind I was king pimp, slaying every woman in my path… some other guy having the ability to make *my* woman cream was completely outside my reality. Actually WATCHING it shattered that reality entirely.

This story does actually have a happy ending. Some years later I met a sweet, intelligent, lovely, adventurous woman. As our relationship grew we talked about our deepest desires. She confided in me many fantasies, including that she was bi-curious and willing to explore… and I wanted to help HER explore. That shift in focus made all the difference as explore we did, and still do today 12 years later.

I'm convinced that as earth-shaking as that day was those years ago, it set the foundations for a deeper relationship with this woman. The petty jealousies that arise these days are nothing compared to that experience, and are quickly and directly dealt with through honest communication.

Perhaps there is no growth without pain.

>He said that he gives her strong orgasms. I believe him. He said the orgasms >were from both physical and mental stimulation. That is the mark of a man who >is doing it right.

This is indeed the mark of a man who is doing it right. At the same time, I’m sure you have experienced women who are naturally very orgasmic. And they’re orgasmic almost to the exclusion of all else. This type of woman could hump an armchair in front of a complete stranger then fall to the ground convulsing and squirting in a wealth of orgasmic madness. They’re rare but they do exist. His girl might be THAT sexual. This would likely skew the analysis. Is she sharing her fantasy with him because she actually likes him? That would be my first guess but it remains possible that she’s just a wonderfully nasty little slut who is tired of ignorant lovers and societal oppression. Her frustration, combined with her sense of deservedness, enforces her commitment to breaking the chains that restrain her innate sexual vitality.

As I read his letter, I considered his descriptions to be that of man who suffers from a grave detachment from sexual-reality. Consequently, I held firmly to my skepticism, rendering his claims to be unlikely in my view. I never suspected that he was dishonest. I thought he was delusional. I believe she had orgasms with him, not necessarily BECAUSE of him. I think you’ve previously called it a human dildo? It’s possible, yes?

>It may come as a shock to most men, and disturbing to men currently in a >relationship, but in actuality most women have that fantasy.

Yup, it is disturbing to most men in relationships. Instead of happily greeting the information and carefully folding it into their sex-lives to cultivate a kick-ass sexual interface, they panic and lose sleep and lose good women. A tragic waste. Something that could result in a powerful bond is instead viewed as the deplorable perversion of a sexual miscreant.

Yes, most women certainly do have that fantasy. I personally hear it with fair consistency. It’s more likely that some women would share their fantasies with a stranger like me than their partners. They see me as a regular dude hitting on them in a pub. Then I drop a few of my stand-by information-bombs and they quickly open up and start sharing stuff that would offend Seymour Butts. AND just sharing this stuff with me makes them hot. This happens enough so that I know precisely how dangerous a good lover can be. Women don’t need to fuck you to know that you’re a sexual master because they have keen sensory awareness to this sort of male energy. This is what they want, need, crave. They spend a lifetime of deprivation, searching hungrily like sharks, moving from one ignorant lover to the next. This is why The David Shade Corporation is NOT just a business; it’s a revolutionary gift to WOMEN. It’s intelligently designed therapy for our sexually oppressed cultures.

>What is rare is when she reveals it to her man, fearing that he would take it as a >derogatory reflection on him, fearing that she would appear as not being true or >devoted.

Yes. Very true. She expresses her devotion and he takes it as the opposite. This is a common sequence and a large source of relationship frustration. And additionally, she would fear that he would perceive her as SICK (e.g. your emailer).

Women are faced with three possibilities when they reveal this stuff to their partner:

1) He thinks she’s unfaithful and sick. He runs out the door.
2) He likes the idea and he’s into it but due to his fixation on HIS sexual contentment, he goes the wrong way and pursues his sexual goals rather than celebrating her sexual liberation.
3) He likes the idea and he has the awareness to lead her through the fantasy which allows it to materialize (or he at least supports her excursion into the unknown). These men make up a very small portion of the male population, and they probably read your work.

>Very few commenters stated that it should happen: SinisterUrge, Stifler, >psihi4no, themikeaustin, cargoman, himileagejim. I agree with them.

I certainly feel that it should have happened in the interest of HER SEXUAL EXPLORATION. And I would have happily suggested a loose itinerary for him to follow. However, your emailer was not qualified; he would have just fucked it up. Until a man proves his eligibility, I reserve most recommendation. Baby steps.

Thanks,

S. Stone

This guy totally missed the point. His woman was sharing a part of herself that she probably never revealed to another man. What an honor. And yet all he could do was react like some hard-hat from my grandfather's generation. It's no wonder that most women are so guarded sexually, and that it takes a lot trust-building to open them up. We have to overcome past boyfriends like him, and sadly there are far more American men on the puritanical side of the spectrum than on the enlightened side.

Take the e-mailer. He is acquainted with David's works (or at least the basics) and he STILL is steeped in narrow views about male sexuality.

His poor spelling, grammar and syntax reflect his limitations. His rambling text is diffuse and flowy, which shows a lack of strong masculine intent and direction. His assertion that any real man would be offended about his girlfriend wanting to do two guys is a conventional view he picked up from his dad or his jock buddies in high school or the church. Again, the thing I find most surprising is that he is on this Web site at all.

Fantasies don't have to be fulfilled literally. The brain is the biggest sex organ. If you are out somewhere with your woman, both of you could have fun pointing out two guys in the room she'd like to fuck. Then later, when you and her are having sex, you could use the material for dirty talk.

While you ravish her, you could stick your finger up her ass and coo in her ear: "You are sandwiched between those two men we saw at the bar, and they are so turned on by you. They are both inside you, fucking you like the naughty slut you are. And I'm standing in the corner, watching you get double-pumped, and enjoying every second of it. See me smiling?"

Maybe in this century, we can lead the charge in destroying the madonna-whore complex once and for all.

The emailer had not purchased any of my products, and he was new to my email newsletter.

You were spot on on saying men under 30 find it a threat to the possibility of the fantasy actually happening.
I'm 25, and just the faint idea of watching my girl get fucked by other guy is absolutely ludicrous.
As long as it stayed in fantasyland, no problem for me, no matter how wild the fantasy could be, I would consider it normal and not be affected. But to happen for real? No way.

Some would say it's insecurity, but I say it's beyond it. My woman could get fucked by a guy with a tiny dick and zero stamina, a guy 1/100th the lover that I am, and the event would still bother me a LOT. It's a territorial thing to me. Nobody touches my girl but me. Other men have fucked her before of course, but it's something I wouldn't make pictures in my head, at all.

Even if this whole "honey, if that's your fantasy, I'll arrange for you to get banged" was the right path to sexual illumination, I would compare it to buddhist monks meditating to completely let go of their ego. Maybe, in 40 years of sublimination of the "self" they will enjoy a level of happiness and understanding we ego-trapped people will never grasp…
But the question is, is it really worth it?
For me, no matter how "good" it might be, it probably won't EVER be worth it..

Thanks S. Stone for your detailed comments. Could you elaborate a bit on your 'information bombs'?

Regards,

J

>Thanks S. Stone for your detailed comments. Could you elaborate a bit on your >'information bombs'?

Hey Jay,

I think we’re off-topic here but I want to answer your question because it’s the one I get the most. Hopefully David will moderate accordingly

I learned several years ago that anything worth having is worth working for. What am I saying? Many of the lonely net-surfers are looking for a missing link, a critical piece of information, a magical answer to their “problems”; it doesn’t exist. The thing that appeals to me most about Shade’s work is that it provides DATA, almost in course-form, to be studied, practiced, assimilated and then tailored to the person using it so it fits with their style and personality. Sure, there are some quick tricks and a few novelties because they are fun and they sell well, but the greatest value is attained when the information alters the thought process of the student. That does not happen quickly, it does not happen easily and, most importantly, it does not happen AT ALL unless the student BELIEVES that it is righteous and lethally affective. The biggest problem with that last fact is many of the guys in bad relationships or who have weak sex-lives, typically are not inclined to take responsibility for their lack, nor are they inclined to take personal inventory and really work to make the changes. So if they can’t do that much, they will never fully believe in their heart that Shade’s information is factual. “Woe is me, women are crazy, I just want to bang as many as possible, I just want to get my nut and go back to my Play Station, etc.” In most cases, IF they decide to do something about their situation (other than play the victim), what they usually do is look for “tips and tricks” behind the anonymity of the internet. This mental paradigm deems those men helpless.

I am not at all suggesting you’re one of those men, Jay.

But my buddies often ask me similar questions (they ask me what to say) because they seek actual real-world verbiage so they can use it as a tool to break down barriers, to discuss this stuff with women simply as means to procure pussy. When this is the case case, we have a problem and I cannot help. If you recite something that I suggest, you will be even WORSE off than if you say nothing at all. How many women have heard strange men unsolicitedly explain that they’re sexual dynamos? Many. It’s repellant to women because it conveys a sexual agenda, among other things. So my suggestion is: you must OWN what you say and BELIEVE what you say and deliver it with threatening confidence. As a Shade student, you hopefully already know this. So if you’re present in your being and you converse with new female prospects in a matter-of-fact manner and you simply discusses the mysteries and science of human sexuality such that you don’t care if she comes or goes (and you incorporate comfortable silences, doses of stern eye contact and a powerful voice and body language), she will hang on your words, usually. And I say “usually” because this does not always work; first, you need something good to work with, Man! So no matter what I say to you, it’s dangerous because of the multitude of possible interpretations. If it’s YOU who is involved in the interaction, the information must be delivered with your style, your flavor, your energy.

If she learns something from you, it’s exceedingly powerful on many levels. But the information must be believable and delivered with proper timing for it to work. If she learns something from you about her sexuality, she will yearn for more. These are what I refer to as “information bombs”. Even if you are a total stranger, if she feels empowered and invigorated by a new sexual understanding, it’s liberating and refreshing for her and those feelings can result in a welling of sexual energy within her that you can further manipulate. She will link that experience to you which gives you a power over her that must be used RESPONSIBLY and ETHICALLY. So in order for her to learn from you, you must be a true fucking man, all the way through to your core. You must be a man of dignity and a man of wisdom and experience and expertise. That takes time and practice and planning. You must be willing to take risks and you must be able to tolerate failure.

S. Stone

Ok. I have a question. This is on the discussion about the girl who wants her man to watch her get banged by two men. You say its fine and normal. Here are a couple of my questions. How many times is that normal before she is just being slutty? And if you're giving your woman great orgasms and she never requests anything like that and shoots the idea down when you do does that mean you're doing something wrong or that its just not a fantasy of hers?

>Ok. I have a question. This is on the discussion about the girl who wants her man to watch her get banged by two men. You say its fine and normal.Here are a couple of my questions. How many times is that normal before she is just being slutty?And if you're giving your woman great orgasms and she never requests anything like that and shoots the idea down when you do does that mean you're doing something wrong or that its just not a fantasy of hers?

I think you are to be commended for awakening your girlfriend's potential for exploring and enjoying her innate feminine sexuality. I take her fantasy as a sign that she is maturing sexually and becoming open to other experiences she finds exciting. I was delighted when my girlfriend expressed the same fantasy and I helped her fulfill it. I enjoyed being present when she did and watching her being pleasured was a pleasing experience for me as well. My definition of sexual activities seems to be more inclusive than yours. You will probably be happier and less threatened by staying within your comfort zone. With more experience you may find you zone expanding.as you girlfriend is doing.

This whole idea about watching your woman get DP… by two guys… I just want to know if there is a single guy here who is NOT bothered by that, because I would love to understand how that would be possible. I certainly wish that I was secure/ open enough to do that, but I could never imagine being able to handle that. Maybe that's a bad thing.

Sure Jesse!
Hand on my heart, I'm not bothered by it!

Actually I'm turned on by the thought.
(I'm 27 y.o. but apparently have the mind of a 50 y.o - THAT, however, bothers me)

The fact that she fantasies about having two guys double team her is not that strange.

The fact that I'm in her fantasy with here watching the whole thing is her minds way of allowing her to have the naughty fantasy without feeling guilty.

If I watch the whole thing I must be OK with it and hence it is OK for her to have the fantasy. No guilt.

//Joe